Education Short List

Part Four: Final Installment

9. Who should I be contacting with my questions, thoughts, or concerns?

You will probably think of other things you wanted to ask or clarify after the meeting is over. Make sure that before you leave you know who to call or email with those issues. Get their contact information before you leave and make sure that they know they will be hearing from you. That way, you won’t waste your time trying to find someone to answer your questions after the meeting is over.

10. Can we restate briefly what we have discussed and what we have agreed our next steps will be?

This question can seem a bit silly, but I can’t tell you how many times I left a meeting thinking that everyone at the table agreed that we would proceed with testing only to get an angry or confused phone call later from a parent who wanted to know why we were testing their student. Even though the parents may have signed a “permission to evaluate” form, these meetings can be long and confusing – anyone can forget or misunderstand something that happened. That’s why it is always a good idea to make sure everyone is on the same page before anyone leaves the table.

Closing Thoughts

Hopefully, these questions will provide you with the confidence you need to be an active, involved member in your son or daughter’s academic team. Remember, aside from your child, you are the most important member of the team because you are advocating for your child and because you know your son or daughter better than anyone else. Do not be afraid to ask for things to be explained more than once, to ask for alternative ideas to the ones being presented, to offer ideas and suggestions of your own, or to refuse what the school district wants to do. By working hand in hand with your child’s school, you will help ensure that your son or daughter experiences the success that they are capable of.

Part 3

6. What will happen if the testing data indicates that my child qualifies for services?

This question is important because you want to have an idea of what is going to happen the next time you meet with your son or daughter’s academic team. If your child’s testing indicates that he/she qualifies for services, what will the school want to do at that next meeting? They should be able to provide you with a rough idea about what they will want to do in this case. You and your spouse need to be ready to discuss whether or not you want your child to receive additional services or supports. Remember, even if the testing comes back indicating that your child could qualify for Special Education services, you are not required to have him/her identified as Special Education. While it might be the best option for providing your son or daughter with the type of support they require, it is important to always remember that you, as parent, have the final say in that decision.

7. What happens if the testing indicates that my child does not qualify for services?

Just like the previous question, it is also important to be prepared for what might happen if the testing data comes back indicating that your child is struggling, but not because of a disability that requires special services. If you have decided that you want your child to receive Special Education services, it can be difficult to find out that they do not qualify for them. If this happens, you will want to be prepared to discuss what the school (and what you) can do to help your child succeed without needing to be identified as Special Education.

8. What supports do you think will be most beneficial for my child and why?

Regardless of whether or not your child is identified as someone who qualifies legally for Special Education services, your son or daughter’s academic team should eventually be moving towards a discussion of what needs to be happening at school and at home in order to help your child achieve academic success. If your child is identified, an IEP (an Individualized Education Plan – a legal document that spells out exactly what services your child will receive and what academic, behavioral, or social goals they might be working towards), will address those supports. If your child is not going to be identified, the team still needs to discuss how they are going to address the concerns that led to this first meeting in the first place. When suggestions are made (i.e. that his/her teachers will check their agenda books at the end of the day to make sure that all homework is written down) make sure that you understand why that support is being suggested. Additionally, if you do not think that it will be successful, don’t be afraid to state that you do not want to try that support – you know your child better than anyone.

End of Part 3

Part 2

3. What have you been doing about these issues so far?
If you didn’t ask this during your discussion of Question 2, ask it now. Make sure you take notes of the things that have already been tried, how long they were tried for, and whether or not they are at all successful. This is important because you want to make sure that if a strategy is not working for your student, it doesn’t end up being tried again, or continued if it is unsuccessful.

4. What does the school want to do now?
If you have been called to a meeting to discuss testing your child for Special Education, the school district is required by law to provide you with paperwork that explains exactly what your rights are and what the entire process of testing, identification, and placement will look like. They are not legally allowed to do any official testing without your permission, so if you do not want to give it right then, DON’T! Tell them that you need a few days to read through the material, talk about it with your spouse and with your child, and just time to think. It is important to remember that you do not have to make any major decisions at this first meeting. At the same time, if the school has explained their concerns you and you understand them and agree that more testing might be a good thing, don’t be afraid to proceed with the testing – even if the testing comes back and indicates that your child qualifies to receive services, the school district can not do anything without your permission.

5. How long will the testing take? This is a very simple question. Most states have a 30-60 day time-limit on how long a school can take to test a student from the moment a parent signs the permission to evaluate form to when they have to meet with parents to review the testing data. Make sure you find out if the time-limit is for “school days” or “calendar days.” Have an idea of when you should be hearing back from the school with information.

Due to this article’s importance, it is being broken up into several parts. During each Sunday in the month of April, you will find one part of this article.

It’s something that happens to most parents at one time or another, and yet it is an issue that so many parents find challenging. As a parent, it can be frustrating, nerve-wracking, and infuriating to be contacted by your child’s school about problems or concerns about your child. You need to be your son’s or daughter’s strongest advocate, yet it can be intimidating to do that if you do not feel adequately prepared to ask the questions you need to in order to have a clear picture of what the school is discussing. With that in mind, I’ve created a simple list of ten questions you can bring to any initial meeting. These questions, which I will post over the next few weeks, will get your child’s educational team (which should consist of you and your spouse, your child’s teacher(s), the school principal or vice-principal, and possibly your school guidance counselor, nurse, and any other specialists, such as speech therapists, school psychologists, etc.) off on the right foot and will get you the information you need in order to make intelligent and informed decisions regarding your child and their education.

Before I begin, please allow me to recommend one thing that can really make all the difference in making your interactions with your child’s school district as positive as possible. Despite whatever reservations, fears, or concerns that you may have about meeting with your child’s school, try to approach this first meeting with an open-mind and without anger or frustration. In almost all cases, teachers and other school employees are truly acting with your son or daughter’s best interests in mind. They may not always communicate that as well as they should, but it is only when parents, teachers, and other school faculty members work together as an inter-disciplinary team that your child’s needs can be best met.

1. What is the purpose of this meeting?
It sounds like a somewhat obvious question, but sometimes making sure that everyone at the meeting is on the same page is a very helpful way to begin. This is also a time that you as a parent can express any frustration or concern that you have in a positive, constructive way. For example, Mrs. Smith informed me that this is where she expressed that she was surprised to even be here since neither she nor her husband had heard anything about any problems her son was having. She stated that she was very concerned that the school would suggest Special Education testing before they had even tried to communicate with them about concerns. By doing this, Mrs. Smith let the school know that she was displeased, but also let them know that she was at the meeting to come up with solutions.

2. What exactly are the concerns the school has regarding my child?
This is a good time to be prepared to take notes. The school should be able to provide you with specific examples of the problems they are seeing. If they are behavioral issues, ask for examples of the behavior, when the behavior is seen, how frequently the behavior is observed, and if it always happens under the same conditions (i.e., at the same time of day, with the same teacher or students, etc.), and what the school has tried already when dealing with the problem. If they are learning issues, ask to see examples of your son or daughter’s work, ask the teacher who teaches that subject to explain the problem area(s) in more detail – what is your student doing in comparison with other students his/her age, ask if the problem is with one unit or lesson in particular (i.e. grammar or fractions) or if your child is struggling with all units equally. Your job as your child’s advocate should be to make absolutely sure that when you leave the meeting you understand exactly what the school’s concerns are and how they have been dealing with those concerns thus far.

End of Part 1