Education Short List

Due to this article’s importance, it is being broken up into several parts. During each Sunday in the month of April, you will find one part of this article.

It’s something that happens to most parents at one time or another, and yet it is an issue that so many parents find challenging. As a parent, it can be frustrating, nerve-wracking, and infuriating to be contacted by your child’s school about problems or concerns about your child. You need to be your son’s or daughter’s strongest advocate, yet it can be intimidating to do that if you do not feel adequately prepared to ask the questions you need to in order to have a clear picture of what the school is discussing. With that in mind, I’ve created a simple list of ten questions you can bring to any initial meeting. These questions, which I will post over the next few weeks, will get your child’s educational team (which should consist of you and your spouse, your child’s teacher(s), the school principal or vice-principal, and possibly your school guidance counselor, nurse, and any other specialists, such as speech therapists, school psychologists, etc.) off on the right foot and will get you the information you need in order to make intelligent and informed decisions regarding your child and their education.

Before I begin, please allow me to recommend one thing that can really make all the difference in making your interactions with your child’s school district as positive as possible. Despite whatever reservations, fears, or concerns that you may have about meeting with your child’s school, try to approach this first meeting with an open-mind and without anger or frustration. In almost all cases, teachers and other school employees are truly acting with your son or daughter’s best interests in mind. They may not always communicate that as well as they should, but it is only when parents, teachers, and other school faculty members work together as an inter-disciplinary team that your child’s needs can be best met.

1. What is the purpose of this meeting?
It sounds like a somewhat obvious question, but sometimes making sure that everyone at the meeting is on the same page is a very helpful way to begin. This is also a time that you as a parent can express any frustration or concern that you have in a positive, constructive way. For example, Mrs. Smith informed me that this is where she expressed that she was surprised to even be here since neither she nor her husband had heard anything about any problems her son was having. She stated that she was very concerned that the school would suggest Special Education testing before they had even tried to communicate with them about concerns. By doing this, Mrs. Smith let the school know that she was displeased, but also let them know that she was at the meeting to come up with solutions.

2. What exactly are the concerns the school has regarding my child?
This is a good time to be prepared to take notes. The school should be able to provide you with specific examples of the problems they are seeing. If they are behavioral issues, ask for examples of the behavior, when the behavior is seen, how frequently the behavior is observed, and if it always happens under the same conditions (i.e., at the same time of day, with the same teacher or students, etc.), and what the school has tried already when dealing with the problem. If they are learning issues, ask to see examples of your son or daughter’s work, ask the teacher who teaches that subject to explain the problem area(s) in more detail – what is your student doing in comparison with other students his/her age, ask if the problem is with one unit or lesson in particular (i.e. grammar or fractions) or if your child is struggling with all units equally. Your job as your child’s advocate should be to make absolutely sure that when you leave the meeting you understand exactly what the school’s concerns are and how they have been dealing with those concerns thus far.

End of Part 1